really need this..(i thought)

i was so tense this morning. i just didn’t know why. i had no mood to go have breakfast with the usual corum. maybe because the late-late night outing i had in two straight nights. and the workload is abusing me…felt like i had to take care of  everything in the office…

we had the usual wednesday morning meeting this morning. and with the progress of everything, there will be troubles coming along.  and yes, i had to manage and deal with those things… feel so tired. both physically and mentally.

i just want to curl and rest now. if i closed my eyes, for sure i will be drifting away. no of course i can’t do that. i had so much work to do…

anyway, to my abang, selamat bertunang! wish you happy always. don’t quite believe he’s gonna get engaged so soon. after all that happened. (don’t know why am i so damn excited about this.. 😛 )

to my awak, i miss you, so much. wish u were here. why when we were apart from each other the emotion will be taking things over? why are we so damn playing with our ego before? i don’t know why, but yesterday i was so confidently addressed u as my long-distance boy friend? :p hope u don’t mind. miss u dear.

friends, i am really grateful for having u guys around me, to lean and to turn to, happy or sad, we’ll stick together. love u guys. thanks for being around.


when am i going to…

this page had been opened since last 30 minutes and i didnt have a slight chance to type anything, because? my boss was sitting right before my eyes, to be precise, he was holding the backside of my laptop screen. and now they (my boss and my senior) are making jokes about the other officers. about who am i going to choose as my life partner is there were only these two guys in the world…haha, i noticed the face of Z and H were changed as my boss (Mr. .A) said that. surely they did feel a little shy.

tonite will be a movie nite. we are going to go and watch a movie-deathnote at cineleisure, the curve, somewhere in damansara. hopefully we will make it at time-because now it is raining heavily out there.

this morning, a special friend sent me an sms, which did make my day.  hmm i miss him so much.  wish he is here.  around, at least. but he’d been so busy (he told me that-i did trust him so far..) wish we can keep in touch as we’ve been before, during our uni years.

at lunch, had a marvellous get-together with the 105ers. hope this friendship will last forever, wish there will be one of us to be the next next next next Chief Secretary of the Government.  after lunch, i received a phone call telling me that i was appointed (with consensus of the hi committee) as the treasury of the 105ers.  what an honoured! hope i can give my best, because i am so proud with this committee.

a friend of mine will be having his special day this saturday, and bro, i am so proud to be one of the hi-witnesses. wish u happy. i always look up and respect you for being an entertaining brother. pray for me, will you. thanks for the invitation.

friendship sure mean a lot to me.  hopefully all my friends do feel the same. till here, bye for now. have a nice day.


spent almost two full days with some close friends (the 105ers).  doing nothing. just these : driving, or convoing?, eating out, attending openhouse invitations, and a wedding ceremony.  and watching a series of reshow of james bond. that was a great time.

and now, back to the weekdays, where most of the time is spent in the office. we hardly see each other, if we lucky enough, we could meet each other during dinner or teatea.  but most of the lads are somewhere else, attending the course for their department.  some had to go for retreat, inspection, meeting and likes…which make it possible for us to gather just like what we’d done last weekend.  and of course, i already missed them.

but as usual, (i said this way too many times, but i’ll say it again) life must go on! right? friends are there to support us, and to be with us when we need them.  so we must do that to them also.  we don’t do and hope them to do that to us, we first to make moves if we suspect something is wrong with our friends.  always try to keep in touch with them.

hmm something’s coming up.  had work to do.  i had my own job, to keep me alive. but friends make my life alive.  haha friends influence me sooo much.  tata

break up make up

heard from a gal pal, she broke up with her boy friend yesterday.  hmm. this news influenced me, badly.  her boy friend did many things to make this relationship up.  so did she.  but feeling can’t be fooled.  the love is not there.  the relationship is going on because of the years they had together. once.

the years when they are their number one. he was the one for her, and so she was the one for him.  her x told me if the girl stay in this relationship, based only on sympathy, then he will let her go.  he doesnt want this girl to suffer, and to sacrifice herself for someone else. he just wanted her to be happy.  but the girl won’t go away, because she’s so guilty.  gulty of leaving her long term and loving x boy friend.  the boy friend she loved so much before she knew another guy who does love her the same.  but this new guy is more sensitive to her feeling and life.  the guy she combfortable to be with. hmm

so i told him, life must go on.  if love doesn’t stay, we also have to move on.  memories linger. that’s what they are for.  to remind us of what we’ve gone through. 

we don’t really plan it, right?

“i am not going to be at the AGM. u knew it, right?” that was how the conversation started. the one that set me in not-so-good mood.

i thought i am going to that AGM.  our department annual meeting.  i was supposed to be one of the high committee.  but, my name is listed for an HR course.  at the same time of the AGM. what can i do.  my immediate boss-we call him Mr. A, ok? had agreed to let me be in the course.  so i think this course is better to be in than the AGM, but since i am the committee, i had to forsake this chance to attend the course. u see, when i am to attend any course, there will be something blocking my way.huh.

for example, on the third week of August, i was supposed to attend a seminar, but because the workload is mounting high, my big boss (Mr. D) didn’t allow me to be there. yes, as other officers are away…and there is no officer in charge of the office, so they placed me here.(in the office) hah whatever…i get used to this.

luckily, i had friends to turn to.  never mind if some of the guys (105ers) tend to make fun of my innonceneness, it was fun and relief to tell them and then, listen to their comments which are hardly useful…but i will be having nice laugh with them.

something’s coming up. so gtg.

the warm atmosphere

had nice time during lunch with some friends, yes from the group of 300 something. or we would like to be known as one-zero-fivers (105ers).  talked about anything we can lead to.  when a person mutters a word, the rest will go and talk, about anything related to the word. haha, anyway, those who understand will understand. 😛

planned a great get along tonite.  to watch this movie : flushed away.  had booked 10 tickects.  at tgv. 

warm atmosphere : my office, to be more precise.  it contains of a group of warm officers, though sometimes they neglected me but they somehow tried to be nice to me.  and the staff are cool! we can talk about anything and can always make hot gossiped. haha that’s what i love most.  heh, wasting time doing nothing expect chatting. while having a cup of tea. hmm nice.

anyway, there’s a little part of the office who doesn’t belong to this warm group.  not that they don’t try, but we (the warm and cool ones :P) can’t afford to approve them.  whenever they tried to mingle, we, will find some way to escape or to ignore their words, or worse their presence. haha. i guess it is a common thing in any office.

my immediate bos had treat me a nice meal. for lunch. it was a usual fried chicken, with rice.  but it was so delicious! maybe because it came from the sincere heart, haha.

next week will be a busy week. so this weekend. had 1 invitation for wedding ceremony and 3 openhouses on saturday. and on sunday we will be organizing an openhouse, at my friend’s house. em yes.  from 105ers..

guess that’s all. have an openhouse to attend this evening. enjoy.

so much is going on

i don’t really know whether this blog will last or not.  i am afraid if i’ll forget the password.. i already had a friendster blog, but i think there are somethings are not public enough to be posted there.  so i hope the security of this blog is better than the friendster’s one.

so much is going on.  my life evolved badly during first 6 months of the year.  i met more friends, a bunch of good friends whom i can always turn to…made some hot scandals, huh…made it at first without knowing that those relationship will turn into hot stuff…

so much is going on around me.  friends left, friends got married, friends had babies…friends flew.  for better.

had a relationship.  had to break it up. forever and for good.

had an on going friendship.  a special friendship with those 300 something people.  funny right? 300 something? nevermind.  those who understand will understand.

boyfriends? i survive so far, without one.  lucky me.  anyway, still hoping for a boyfriend. it’s a girl’s dream. 

life? enjoy it.  at least by the time i post this.

job? being one and only female officer here,  i get used to get along with those lame jokes.  and to be neglected during course or seminar is a common thing.  i am needed to manage things, and when things are going on smooth, they tend to forget me. complain? no. i am not that sort of people.  maybe i’ll fight but now i just want to sit and watch. until? until someone realize that i am in the office…

enjoy the first.  more to come.