Bebel lagi, I kan suka bebel…

Tapi rupanya ada orang yang lagi suka bebel! HAHA.

No, malas nak cerita pasal orang, clever girls don’t talk about other people. Instead, we talk about perception. Adeh. Bolehlah kan labu.

Case 1 : Breakfast apa pagi ni?

Oh well, it’s not that I don’t appreciate your thoughts, but I don’t think I like being asked about this kind of things. Alamak, jahat tak kalau marah orang tanya I macam tu. Or adakah itu faktor umur? Teringat pula pakcik I pernah cakap, kalau SMS setakat nak tanya “dah makan ke?” Tak payahlah! Membazir katanya. Tapi tu dulu, masa kos satu sms ialah RM0.20, sekarang ni pakai apps dah tak rasa kredit habis for satu satu text, kan? Tapi masalahnya, (no, it’s not really a problem) orang yang tanya I tu lagi tua dari I. Takde kerja ke dia? Mungkin sebab dia boss kot? Or mungkin itu salah satu small talk? Tapi takkanlah terjadi hari-hari. If you have nothing to talk about, please don’t talk, boleh? Oh, cerewetnya I!

Case 2 : Nak orang macam I! 

I selalu rasa I adalah seorang yang balance. Gitu (perasan, biasalah) so I was like, hmmm if I want someone, I want it to be just like me. Hmmm. Tapi Ted dan Robin kata (or was it Barney and Robin, or maybe Lily and Marshall – belasah) katanya kalau dua-dua awesome (ehem!) nanti susah jugak! Like, hmmm I peninglah! I selalu terfikir, if I didn’t get a reply from this one, perhaps it was because I also didn’t reply someone else’s text. You see that one I hoped would reply my text, was just like me! He didn’t reply because he was like, meh… malas. Did I send a trivial text, like “dah makan ke?” hahaha. Funny! Kena sebijik kan? Nope I would text nothing important, like “hmmmm” – this is only if we got along very well and we understood each other lah. But hmmm… entahlah. I pun tak faham. But I concluded that I am a bit complicated so I hope for someone that is much more simpler but at the same time, could conclude things for me. I have so many questions, I think – don’t you think so? I hope my significant other (if there’s one) would be able to solve these questions like – nak makan mana? biru ke merah? whatever lah.

Case 3 : Hormat-menghormati, menjaga hati

Kadang-kadang bila I rasa orang tak hormat I, I would just keep myself quiet and then, would find time to reflect on my behaviour, if I was lucky I would be guided by good people. But most of the times, I would just realized that I was being too kind. (I know, perasan). Tapi ia tidak mustahil kan? I rasa semua orang ada rasa diri mereka patut dihormati, dan dijaga hati. Sebab tu dia berang kalau kita tersalah cakap or anything kita cakap akan sampai di hati dia, menyebabkan dia berperasaan diri dia tak dihormati (I pernah juga rasa) tapi… sebenarnya, if things are not related to us, we could just laugh about it kan, if things were on us/about us, we felt like, eh… what the hell? Oh, I malas nak fikir.

I lupa I selalu cakap macam ni, kalau benda tu sampai directly to u, your name was on that thing, then kita kena fikir, betul ke kita buat benda tu? If tak betul, then kena betulkan. Tapi, kalau kita cuma dengar someone said “tadi Mr A cakap pasal you pasal ni pasal tu, tak puas hati dengan u” tak payahlah nak sentap apa-apa. If betul si Mr A tak puas hati dengan u… biar dia cakap sendiri dengan u. But then, I sendiri pun lupa, okay! next time if tak puas hati dengan orang, teruslah pergi cakap dengan orang tu, okay?

Case 4 : Jangan perasan diri tu baik sangat 

Ye, Aishah… you ingat you tu hebat sangat ke? Entahlah kadang-kadang okay je nak rasa hebat because sometimes we deserve it. Asal tak susahkan orang ikut sukalah kan.

Case 5 : Jangan ingat kita je busy 

Betul tu… especially bila kita buat kerja melibatkan orang ramai. Kita jangan ingat part kita je yang penting, dan kita juga yang banyak kerja. Eh, ke I dah pernah tulis pasal ni? Tu jelah, gist dia, semua orang pun sibuk dan kita kalau tak boleh membantu, jangan menyusahkan. (Ingat tu aishah!)

Sekian dulu bebelan I pada minggu ini! Selamat hujung minggu semua!

 

 

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Central Market

I posted this photo on Instagram just now and realized I had so much to share about this place. Central Market, or CM – I think the first place I went for a date in KL? It’s 17 years ago with my then bf. (Hope he is well, anywhere he is). He waited for me at the Bangkok Bank – and walked with me to CM and later I think we went to KLCC  using Putra LRT. I was on the break from college, I had matrix in Penang. Memories!

I think we broke up via phone – it happened when I was out with some friends, when I was also there at CM. (Irony). He called me that day. I really feel like I wanted to forget the reasons why I ignored him, but I can’t. I am suck at forgetting unimportant and trivial things like these. I remember his question “so, this is it?” I was like, “yeah if you put it like that” And we were off. That was in 2002. I think I did take him for granted. (Hope he’s happy now).

I had a friend who told me he used to just sit at CM and watch people. Those were the days when he didn’t know what to do, some were hard times when life was a bit sad.

But anyways, it’s quite sad to be there yesterday, I hope CM won’t lost its charms! I looked at things and thought that I could get this anywhere else, at cheaper price. I didn’t know what to say, just kept it in mind. Maybe because I had a chance to travel around so those things looked usual to me, but maybe for the first timer out to KL, those things would be a real find!

Anyway, it’s 10th Ramadan now, hope you guys had a blessed Ramadan so far. 🙂 InsyaAllah!

 

Think positive!

  • I met a friend at a Pasar Malam last Tuesday. He heard that now I am known as a Subject Matter Expert for a thing that I do now. So I asked him where did he hear about this, apparently it’s a talk among our mutual friends. I hope they talked about me in a positive way;
  • I was appointed to hold some extra curricular activities in the office, and now currently I am the chairman to represent the staff, it was by voting system by the staff too. I hoped people chose me because they believed in my capability to represent them, not because they just wanted to play me – I don’t know. Things like this do happen, no? I think too much – my friends told me;
  • I was chosen to represent the Ministry to be one of the few ones to move the latest national initiatives, I hope that I could contribute accordingly, if not more; and
  • I hope that bosses believe in me, and they way I see/saw things.

 

Planning yang tak kesampaian

Malasnya!

Kadang-kadang kena berhenti bila perasaan untuk mencuba dah hilang. Tak ada motivasi, hanya kemalasan menguasai diri. Sudah baca semua benda, sudah tahu baik dan buruknya tapi perasaan sudah tiada.

The passion’s gone. Nothing left, only a pathetic saying on the mind, calming and reassuring my own self. Pitiful self.

I think it’s time for me to realize that there are some things that I can’t manage to complete. It’s not some sort of giving up (denial) but I think it’s good to know that there’s a stop to everything.

I am quite tired of resting and putting things on hold, maybe it’s time to end things. Maybe some of the things that I thought would be good for me, were never meant for me.

I need to go and sleep on this. Ha, lost count of sleeps already.

Wish me luck.

 

 

Dan lain-lain

So much happened at the office lately, shocking things actually but in a good way things reminded me of the surprise of life. On how things could fall out and fall in in so much ways that sometimes we didn’t expect them to be. But anyway, things happened, always for good. Insya Allah, hopefully all the madness that I felt (or still feel) won’t last long.

Oh, my auntie is going to get married (for the second time, her husband passed away few years back) tonight. Too bad I couldn’t make it. But I will leave for home tomorrow night, insyaAllah.

And hmm I am gonna take a good one week off. I have to optimize my off days since I’ve realized that my off days (balance) were to be burned (something like that la) if I couldn’t finish them all in 3 years…. I am entitled for 30 days off each year. Alhamdulillah.

Okaylah.

Have a great long weekend untuk yang berkenaan.

🙂

Busynya!

Dua minggu kebelakangan ni, sangat busy! Tak larat rasanya. Tapi laratkan juga. Dengan kerja hakiki, kerja sekolah dan kerja persatuan. Takpelah, dua tiga hal boleh manage. Yang satu ni, memang sangat mencabar tapi insyaAllah, there would be no giving up! Pray hard!

Saya tak pasti kadang-kadang, saya ni terlalu rajin ke macam mana. Saya pun tak faham kenapa ada orang macam tu macam ni. Saya pun tak perfect juga, tak baik mana pun, nakal jugak. Banyak dosa jugak. Tapi ada few things yang saya nak buat atau ucapkan, saya akan fikir banyak kali jugak tak mau bagi orang terasa hati ke apa.

Saya ni tak reti nak marah, bebel bolehlah. Tak reti nak arah2 orang yang dah memang takde rasa nak buat sesuatu benda tu, sebab takde maknanya. Saya rasa banyak benda saya buat sebab tak ada orang nak buat. Atau pun, kelemahan saya adalah, saya rasa tak ada orang nak buat benda tu. Saya malas nak suruh-suruh. Cuma saya fikir, kalau saya boleh fikir yang benda tu nak kena buat, kenapa orang lain rasa macam tak perlu buat. Hehe. Ni pasal kerja persatuan ni.

Maybe orang lain ada banyak kerja. Saya ni macam takde kerja kut. Takpelah.

Tapi nasib baik lah ada orang yang membantu. Kalau tak banyak benda tak boleh gerak juga. Alhamdulillah.

 

Hmm. Malas..

Salam.